The dangerous impact of being a people pleaser.
Are you a "people pleaser" or do manage a "people pleaser"?
People pleasers at work may struggle with asserting their needs, communicating effectively, and setting healthy boundaries, which can impact their career growth and fulfillment.
I used to be a people pleaser… it helped me in many ways in facilitating difficult conversations, while people were drawn to my empathic listening skills.
Nevertheless, I didn't know how to say "no", fearing people's anger or rejection.
It also prevented me to acknowledge myself, develop my emotional intelligence, and create strong self-esteem.
So, let me introduce you to what we commonly name "people pleasers".
People pleasers are individuals who have a strong desire to make others happy and avoid conflict, often at the expense of their own needs and goals. This personality trait can be challenging in the workplace, as it can lead to several struggles, including:
difficulty saying no: people pleasers often struggle to say no to requests from colleagues or managers, even if they already have a full workload or the task is outside their expertise. This can lead to feeling overwhelmed, stressed, and burnt out.
lack of assertiveness: people pleasers may avoid conflict or confrontation, which can make it challenging for them to express their opinions, stand up for themselves, or negotiate for what they need. This can lead to feeling undervalued or overlooked at work.
fear of failure or criticism: they may avoid taking risks or trying new things for fear of making mistakes or receiving criticism. This can limit their growth and development in their role and prevent them from achieving their full potential.
struggle to set boundaries: they didn't learn how to set boundaries around their time, energy, and workload, leading to feelings of resentment or burnout. They may also take on tasks that are outside of their job description or work outside of normal business hours to please others (that was definitely me).
difficulty receiving feedback: People pleasers may take feedback personally, even if it is constructive, and struggle to accept criticism without feeling ashamed or defensive. This can prevent them from learning and growing in their role and can negatively impact their performance.
Do those struggles ring a bell?
As a former people-pleaser, seeking love and recognition, I was always going the extra mile.
Therefore, I know firsthand the power of making mindset shifts that prioritize your needs and recognize your strengths.
And as we all are involved in a fast-paced business and economic environment, it pushes us to revise our “comfortable” ways of thinking.
